My roof of security


I think I am fine now. I can let you go.

I thought this way at first too. When you had just gone.

Then life happened.

I realised what it meant to do life without you.

Tossed this way and that. Having to fend for myself in a sea of sharks. I started to swim in a pool of pity.

But even though the gap of you is always there, I am okay now.

It’s time to let you go.

I can do the rest without the missing shape of you. I can take what you gave me and use that. It is little, our time together was not very long. But it is more than enough.

I am free from the ache of missing you, the hardness of lacking your support.

Before, I tried to find things to replace the secure roof you had provided.

I thought wrong, no one cared.

They stripped me of what you had left me.

But not all of it. I finally stopped searching and realised that I had had it all along.

The confidence you gave me. It was in me. And yet I had traded it for approval. I wanted to be liked, loved, taken care of.

But I did not need it from the outside. It was in me all along.

And now I know that God is my secure roof. Under Him I can rest.

I am fine now.


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